Hey there Tumblr.
I haven’t seen you in ages. A lot has happened since I began this blog 6 months ago. I guess it’s time I updated this puppy haha.
I moved. Several times. The place I am at now feels like it will be as permanent as my life can manage. I now live in a house of 5 plus 4 cats. Shayne and his finance’ Kelly live in one room. Shayne’s friend Anthony in in the second room and me and my girlfriend Jamie are in the last room. We have a nice townhouse pretty close to downtown Denver.
The last place I was in was a relative nightmare. I lived with a crazy stripper who was openly cheating on her husband while he was off at boot camp. There was far too much drama at that place.
The place I lived at before that was with a family of vegans. Jamie and I moved there when we lost our place before that. I lived there when I came out as trans.
I am back working at King Soopers again. I work 3am to 1130am three times a week and 730am to 4pm two times a week. I stock the health and beauty items. It’s a pretty physical job that leaves my back shoulders neck and legs in total knotts after working all day.
I had a short trip to San Diego to see family about a week ago. Overall it went great! I finally showed my family what fire poi was and how much it meant to me. I’ve been doing poi for about 4 years as a hobby and the only time I ever showed my parents was about 3 months after I started and was completely horrible at it. It was refreshing to finally show my family my art.
My dad and his wife are moving to Singapore for a year or so for his new job. I want to come out to him before he goes but I don’t know how. I think him seeing my hair the way it is might be starting to clue him in. I told him and Lisa several years ago when they found my hidden stash of girl clothes in my closet. (kind of an ironic place to store them while I was also in the closet.)
Overall my life is going OK. I’ve dealt with the fact that hardly any of my friends want to talk to me anymore. I”ve discovered who my true friends are. I am grateful for everyone I still have in my life. Without all of their support I would have gone mad by now. Well, more mad than a trans person already is.
Well I’m exhausted so I’ll leave it there for now. I have a computer again so I will be posting more often from now on and making videos too.
@11 months ago
I cant wait until I have peace at home.
@1 year ago
My name is Riley. I am a woman. I always have been. I take a great amount of pride in knowing myself that well. It takes a lot of gusto to be that true to yourself. And it takes even more to be that true to other people. We as human beings want to be loved. It’s in our programming. And so when a person such as myself comes along, something gets a little lost along the way. The need to protect yourself becomes greater than your need to be loved. And so we withdraw. We become silent in the background in the hopes that no one will notice the odd one at the back of the row. On the flip side, there are those who act out. In a fit of anger, confusion and denial we detract the attention from our personal struggle by offering forth recklessness and contempt for authority. Most people see this disguised cry for help as proof that the individual is a bad person. This is not the case, they are merely hurting and don’t know what to do with themselves. It isn’t easy to come to terms with yourself. It can lead to sadness and depression if left alone. I don’t know the numbers but the suicide rate for trans people is way higher than that of cisgender people. The rate of unemployment is also way up there. It doesn’t make sense. A person has a right to be happy. Period.
The good news is that there are ways to help trans people feel more included in your life and also their own too. Call them by the name that they have chosen for themselves. That in itself is probably the strongest thing you can do to provide support. Use the proper pronouns that they identify with. If she is a she then call her her. If he is a he then say him. And don’t rule out third genders and all the other parts of the giant trans umbrella. Every person is unique and feels a certain way, so why not help their self confidence levels by addressing them as who they are, not what you see.(unless they transitioned already haha). These are things that I know would help me feel better about myself so I’m sure they will benefit others as well.
I’ll come up with more soon.
@1 year ago
Hi tumblr! Ive missed you. It’s been a while huh? A lot’s happened in my life since then. I’ve been through hardships. I’ve been through miracles. I’ve done stupid things. And I’ve done wonderous things. I have gained new perspective. And I have gained new passion. In the past few months my life has hit the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I have had many different realities revealed to me. They showed me that I was lying to myself, even without knowing it. I have grown. It wasn’t easy. It won’t be easy. But nothing of value is ever easy to acheive. I have many things of value in my life worth fighting for. And so I shall. For when I value something, every effort is made to ensure it becomes reality. I value my Girlfriend. My freedom. My hobbies. My friends. My home. And my identity. I know it isn’t easy to see someone change, but don’t think of it like that. Think of it as revealing the truth. The truth that I have fought so hard to hide my entire life out of fear. And so with my newfound vigor comes a sense of pride. I am what I am. But I am also who I am. Who I am is a compassionate individual. I play. I love. I laugh. And I encourage those around me to reach their greatness. I guess the point of all this ramble is a promise. I promise to be the best me I can be, so that those I help, can be the best they can be. Even in the darkest of hours, the smallest flame can infinitely illuminate the world.
@1 year ago
23 Thanks :)
WAYYYY older sadly, technically I could of taken a few years of partying after high school and still had a 13 y/o kid by now lol
@1 year ago with 490996 notes